How Do You Write Smut When You Don’t Feel Sexy?
Smut is your bread and butter. Most of the time you can knock out a couple of thousand words of sexy goodness a day. But the erotic muse can be fickle, and libidos can go into hibernation for all sorts of reasons. What can you do when your sensual, and thus creative, juices just aren’t flowing?
It happens. Life gets stressful, our physical body falls prey to viruses, our mental health waxes and wanes, and our normally raging libido goes into a sudden retreat like an over-stimulated clitoris. The first, and most important thing is to be kind to yourself. You are not a failure, you’re not an imposter, and you have NOT suddenly lost all your credentials as a Smutlancer. Don’t listen to those negative voices.
Put Your Health First
Take a moment to consider what’s impeding your progress. Are you physically unwell? Would it be the end of the world if you took some time to let your body recover? Are you experiencing a mental health flare-up? Again, getting well is the most important thing. For all the talk of plowing through and not letting your mental illness win, those of us who suffer from mental health conditions know it isn’t that easy.
Your Schedule is Your Friend
If you make a living from your writing, that can impact upon your ability to take time off. The most important thing for anyone who makes a living from freelancing, of either the smutty or vanilla kind, is to have a schedule. It is something that Kayla talks about often at The Smutlancer, and with good reason. Having a schedule enables you to keep track of your projects and deadlines, and allows you to plan your life outside of your Smutlancing work, including time for self-care. Where your schedule can stand it, give yourself a day to go for a walk, watch your favorite movie — whatever it is that gives you some breathing space. Don’t let yourself feel bad about doing it, either. You work hard. You deserve some “you” time.
Five Tricks to Coax Out Your Muse
Let’s assume that for whatever reason, you have to write something today, but you’re feeling really uninspired. I am, predominantly, a writer of erotic fiction, and if I don’t feel sexy, I find it really difficult to come up with smutty stories. When that happens, I need to call on my own sexy arsenal (steady!) to get the groove back.
Fake It ‘Til You Make It
There is an adage amongst writers that you should write 100 words a day, whether you feel like it or not. It doesn’t have to be Pulitzer Prize winning literature; sometimes just starting that flow can be enough to let loose a torrent. You know when you turn on a tap, sometimes you have to let it run for a few minutes before it really heats up and starts to run evenly? It’s like that.
Masturbate
Okay, I know that if you’re not feeling sexy, then you’re not going to feel like “rubbing one out!” But taking time to just lie back on your bed, naked, with your eyes closed can remind your body of what it’s like to feel sensual. Let your mind run wild; call up your favorite fantasy, or create a new one. Touch your skin; how does it feel? You’ve felt sexy before; can you recall how it felt the last time you were really aroused? Use that. If you don’t end up masturbating to orgasm, that’s okay. If nothing else, you’ve still given yourself a lovely gift.
Movies and Music
Films (either porn or vanilla) and music can often trigger thoughts in your head, particularly when you’re a creative person (which I know you are!). What would it feel like to be that character on the screen? What would it feel like to have sex with that actor or musician? What would happen in the X-rated music video for this sultry tune? Let yourself fantasize, and go wild. No one can see what you’re thinking about, and you don’t have to share it with a single soul. Mind over matter, they say, and the brain is the most powerful sex organ we possess.
Revisit Your Past Triumphs
Every Smutlancer has at least one piece of writing of which they are particularly proud. Go back and read it. Remind yourself of how damn good you are when the muse is with you. If it’s a sexy story that you created, or a real-life smutty scenario that you recounted for your readers, you may even find that reading it gets your juices flowing again, in more ways than one!
Use Your Low to Create Your Content
So, you’ve tried those things and you’re still not feeling it. Why not use yourself for inspiration? Maybe the protagonist in your erotic tale is also suffering from a low libido. How do they feel? What might their lover do to get them in the mood? Maybe your protagonist will simply lie there and fantasize, trying to rekindle their sexual spark. What are they fantasizing about? Tell us!
If it’s not smutty fiction but content for a blog post you’re after, tell your readers about your current experience. Not only will it give you content for your site, but that little nugget of your writing could resonate with someone else. After all, we all lose the muse from time to time, and many of your readers will identify with what you’re feeling.
Above All, Don’t Write Yourself Off!
It’s easy to become disillusioned when you’re a creator who finds they are temporarily unable to create, but don’t give up. No matter what it feels like right now, you have not lost any of your talent or ability. For reasons beyond your control, it’s just taking more effort than usual. Keep the faith; your muse will come back. Coax her out with a few of these tricks and remind her of what fun it is to play with you.
It is many years since I have had actual sex with another human even though my libido remains high. The reason is that I don’t find aging bodies (like mine) sexually attractive. The corollary of this is that anyone I am attracted to is unlikely to feel the same way about me. Therefore I have remained celibate. But memory is very strong; the sex scenes in my novel Jessie are largely based on vivid recollections of sex I had long ago. Recalling them makes me horny, and the scenes become easy to write. I also get horny when I reread them. This is a technique that is open to anyone who has had sex. The hard part is finding the language with which to describe your experience.
Thanks for your comment, Lexie. I agree that the remembrance of sensation can be incredibly arousing, and thus provides a useful stepping point into writing erotic scenes. Likewise the arousal engendered by re-reading the erotic scenes from your work, “Jessie” is a means of sparking that sensual match!
Thanks again for your comment. Jupiter x