My Story: Writing About Sex for Money

Kayla Lords Smutlancer Story

“Writing is like sex. First you do it for love, then you do it for your friends, and then you do it for money.” ~Virginia Woolf

I know that Virginia Woolf isn’t specifically talking to sex writers in this quote, but it fits. Her words outline my personal journey into the world of writing about sex for money. What started as a way to write and figure myself out, turned into something I did to connect with the sex blogging community. Then, around 2015, I decided I wanted to make money while writing about sex and relationships.

Becoming a Smutlancer

How did I become a smutlancer (a person who makes money writing about sex)?

Two reasons, really.

First, I’d been a full-time freelance writer in the business world since 2014. I had already learned that businesses legitimately pay writers for their work. I had a handful of clients and made enough money to call it a career.

Second, an adult company reached out to me on and asked if I would write something on my website for them. Oh, and how much would I charge for a link to be included? This was my first step into sponsored posts, a common and sometimes lucrative way to make money writing through your blog. From there, I slapped up a “For Hire” page on my website and waited.

Don’t be surprised – very little happened. Putting up a page was only the first step. Next I had to make connections, keep writing, and promote the hell out of myself.

Believing in the Dream

Just because you tell the world you’re for hire, doesn’t mean they beat down your door and throw money at you. That first step into blogging for money was my first taste. The desire to keep getting paid for my sex-words was strong. I wasn’t sure it was a legitimate writing goal to have, but I wanted it so bad I could taste it.

These days, I contribute to other websites, run my own, and sometimes work as a “social media influencer” although I refuse to call myself that. When I attended my first Eroticon, I found myself in the middle of a group of people who wanted the same things I do. We were all there to create better content, reach more people, and make money doing it. I think that’s when I knew this was real. That I wasn’t alone.

Writing About Sex for Money

Getting to the money-making point wasn’t easy. I’m talking real money, not just the few dollars you need to host your own website each month. It required what every other dream needs – hard work, determination, a strong work ethic, and a willingness to never give up. Even when it seems a little hopeless, keep going. By the time I found my tribe in London, I’d already learned some hard lessons about making the smutlancing life work. I might not be quite where I want to be yet, but I’ve come a long way since the hapless woman who said yes to that first sponsored post.

I don’t know it all, and I won’t pretend that I do. But what I have figured out about this sex-writing life, I want to share with you. You’ve got a smutty story to tell, an opinion on sex, advice about relationships, or something to share with the world, and you want to get paid for your work. You deserve it too.

Welcome to the Smutlancer. You’re not alone in this “crazy” dream of yours. Some of us are living proof that you can make that dream a reality. Stick around and you’ll find out how to do it for yourself.

Kayla Lords

Kayla Lords is a freelance sex writer, podcaster, blogger, all-around sex content creating human, and she really likes creating content. As a writer, she focuses on sex and kink primarily on BDSM and power exchange. She works with private clients to write their content and manage their social media, while also co-hosting two podcasts, running a YouTube channel, and managing multiple blogs. Let's just say, she stays busy and wants to keep it that way. Kayla is an international speaker and an award-winning sex blogger. She believes we are stronger together as a community than we are isolated and apart. We all deserve to get paid for the work we do, but until we understand our cumulative power, we'll all wonder if we're "the only one" doing this smutlancing thing.

2 Responses

  1. Mischa Eliot says:

    It means a lot to me that you’ve started this site. You’ve worked damn hard to get where you are, you’ve gone through a lot of hills and valleys, and helping people zip-line there way through by showing them some ins and outs is the best thing ever. XoXo

    • Kayla Lords says:

      Awww, thank you! I really believe that if we all know more, we can all do better together. Plenty of companies don’t take us seriously because too many of us don’t know what our “vanilla” (read: non-sex) counterparts know – how to pitch, how to price, how to build business relationships. I want to make that happen for more people, and I hope I can.

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